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Mr and Mrs Pirate
by Asa Butcher
2007-09-19 09:37:42
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I Married a Pirate
Written by Samantha David
Myrmidon Books Ltd, 2007

What could be more appropriate than a review of a pirate-themed book on International Talk like a Pirate Day? Don't worry, me hearties, I shall not be writing this review using pirate vernacular nor will I be resorting to terrible buccaneering puns, such as the one I used in last year's review of Treasure Island: Treasure Island is a real gem and pi-rate it ten out of ten. Please accept my apologies for that one.

A few months ago one of the Ovi contributors (sorry, I forget who!) unashamedly contacted everybody in his email address book to promote the first book written by one of their friends. The book was I Married a Pirate by Samantha David, a journalist by trade, and it didn't take long before a postman had dropped a copy upon my doormat, rather than a swashbuckling pirate crashing through the window, scabbard gripped between his teeth, delivering the book with a bloodthirsty roar.

Naturally unfamiliar with Samantha David's work, I was unsure of what to expect from the novel, other than the obvious: A woman gets married to a pirate. Well, that was the first surprise because the man is and isn't a pirate. He doesn't have a parrot perched on his shoulder, he doesn't sport an eye-patch and he doesn't hobble about on a wooden leg, but he does live on a boat in the Caribbean and his attitude to life is just like a pirate's:

"His equally uncompromising approach to visas, taxes, licences, banks, governments, laws, officials, customs, conventions, socially accepted behaviour, women, dogs, meals and business… but that wasn't all. He stole, he smuggled, he dealt with criminals and he kidnapped me."

I Married a Pirate follows Camilla, a poor, stressed English single mother of twin boys living in France, who meets the Pirate online. It doesn't take long for the Pirate to convince her to fly to an island in the Caribbean for a two-week all-expenses paid holiday. Two weeks becomes two months and before she knows it she has married him, but, excuse the cliché, not all is perfect in paradise because the Pirate has her passport, controls life on the island and has pretty much kidnapped her.

Written in the first person as an email to her friend Philippa, Camilla details the circumstances that led to her kidnapping, the irresistible bulldozer sex and reveals her plans to escape. The Pirate is one of the more eccentric literary characters to have crossed my path in a while and he is a man I would love to meet in reality, yet despite him being the antagonist of the story I actually rooted for him more than the kidnapped Camilla.

I believe female readers would love it a great deal more because they would be able to identify with Camilla and her reactions to the situations. As a man, I found her occasionally irritating and didn't understand her methods, but she did keep me fascinated with her interaction with a man as unconventional as the Pirate. There are a number of moments that made me smile, although there were no sudden outbursts of laughter, and it has already been recommended to a few female friends, so I would say to give it ago, especially for the sex scenes – the Pirate can certainly give a jolly rogering…sorry!

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Clint2007-09-19 21:13:30
I knew a pirate once whose gypsy best mate read palms and laid tarmac drives!
Good puns for you Asa you missed the 'where are your buccaneers'.

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