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Dupenews: Make America Rake Again
by Theodore K. Nasos
2018-11-20 08:11:26
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Disclaimer: This is a satirical news piece, just for fun, read at your own risk!

Surveying the damage in California, Mr Trump revisited his jealousy to the Finnish forestry practices claiming that time has come to Make America Rake Again. “You look at other countries where they do it differently and it’s a whole different story,” he said.

I was with the president of Finland, and he said: 'We are a forest nation. We spent a lot of time on raking and cleaning and doing things, and they don't have any problem,” the American president added.

Therefore and to honour Finnish raking, Donald Trump invited a delegation of Finnish raking officials to visit the White House and do the raking they love so much.

The gardener of a psychiatric clinic in Helsinki verified what the president said, “most of our patients love raking. They do it twice, trice a day. Sometimes at the weekends as well. Except one who never does, we call her Hillary.”

An anonymous source from the white house also said that the president thinking to move California to the arctic cycle to be closer to Finland. Then the Californians will have to do raking in the summer, snow cleaning in the winter and no time to be democrats.

President Trump also announced that you can buy your own Make America Rake Again, rake with the Trump logo and gold edge.

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