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Sex Again
by Jan Sand
2007-04-18 10:24:23
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There was a recent news report of an organism, a rotifer (which is a microscopic multi-celled animal), which has been doing quite well for the last forty million years with none of the personality and social disorders which plague humanity in the matters concerning sex.

Like Christ's mother, they produce their young parthenogenetically and the males seem not to exist. If God is busily involved in each virgin conception of this fertile species it is no wonder he seems to have no time currently to untangle the general nastiness that humans are presently indulging in throughout the world.

As someone cursed with an incessant curiosity from birth I, like many other kids, noticed very early that the information concerning the processes involved in my original manufacture were not readily available.

I distinctly remember the short session with an illustrated book that my mother gave my brother and me when I was about four-years-old that absolutely dispelled the general impression then extant for the uninitiated that we were originally distributed by storks as a sort of aerial arm of the United Parcel Service. I had never seen photographs up to that time of a stork capable of carrying a six pound baby (my brother was eight pounds at birth) so I had harbored secret suspicions that something like an oversized pterodactyl might have done the deed. (Dinosaurs were popular amongst kids even when I was a child.)

The book, unfortunately, was not the fascinating The Joy of Sex or even any of the other less explicit descriptions such as The Ideal Marriage which adults at the time kept around to brush up on technique. It merely ignored the more interesting processes that is the continuous and intense concern of adults everywhere for the bulk of their time and skipped directly to that microscopic wriggler hell bent on being first to reach the egg in the multimillion marathon.

Subsequently the organic industry worked hell for leather to knock out an incipient human in the prescribed period of about nine months and that was that. Like a super speed vehicle proceeding through the atmosphere there was a trailing vacuum of information that was only eliminated after puberty, and in very cagey ways that polluted the simple basic biology with, to say the least, odd cautions and dire consequences.

It was not unusual for me as a child to witness dogs sexually mounting each other in the street and since other information was scarce I naturally extrapolated that to humans and often wondered why such a thick aura of secrecy surrounded the process. That dogs frequently utilized my legs in the same manner made me wonder whether humans indulged themselves in that way also but the phenomenon never materialized in my presence.

I grew up in Brooklyn, New York, in the 1930s, well before air conditioning was even a fantasy, and the summer days were frequently so hot that the asphalt in the streets ran in sluggish black streams near the curb. The nights were not much cooler so in the seclusion of our home my parents and my brother and I dispensed with clothing altogether. We all were in decent physical shape so only a few appropriate body parts dangled and it never struck me as even mildly interesting that these parts were unequally distributed between my mother and my father. They were obviously designed for either infant nourishment or waste disposal with absolutely no confusion as to which was what and all of which was very necessary to sustain normal life. And the idea that they had alternate functions for sex never crossed my mind. That nudity could be scandalous seemed to me as odd as a fear of birds or a belief in evil spirits.

The recent comment by a Muslim holy man that standard western style apparel that slightly exposed a few female body parts was as disorienting to males as raw meat is to horseflies seems to me less insulting to women characterized as raw meat (which, basically, we all are) than it is insulting to Muslim men to be characterized as having the mental capacity of horseflies. And yet, strangely, the male Muslim population swallowed this without a murmur.

As an American I was equally disturbed by the furor over the momentary exposure of one of Janet Jackson's nipples at the Super Bowl. Some comments indicated that a child to whom this feeding apparatus was revealed would be mentally crippled for life. Of course, a bottle fed child might find a nipple tipped female breast as odd as if it were tipped with a screw top like a wine bottle but it seems immensely overblown to me to believe a type of packaging might be psychologically damaging.

More recently the newsworthy attempt to exhibit a full sized sculpture of Christ on the cross done in chocolate has aroused a Christian furore worthy of any Muslim hate rally. At first I thought it was the material – chocolate, that incited the riot. But no. What disturbed the mob was the full exposure of Christ's sexual organs. It led me to wonder if Christianity had believed that Christ was not properly endowed and to indicate he was a full fledged male contradicted Biblical indications. But the equally strong prejudice in a good deal of orthodox Christianity that homosexuals are basically an evil twist of God's creation confounds that proposal. For me, it's a quandary. Either the guy was male, or not. It should be made clear.

I have been around for a while and passed through most of the normal life stages of a human being. I have raised a family and become a grandfather and so have at least a modicum of perspective on sex and living but I am still greatly puzzled over what seems to me the psychotic attitudes that pervade, not only the culture I grew up in but almost universally all the various cultures mankind has developed.

The push and pull of attractions and love and repulsions and hate that stream vigorously through almost all humanity from what appears to me as total nonsense has kept me at a distance from what I presume to be my species and made me wonder what kind of odd animals we all are.

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