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10 Helsinginkatu: Chapter 32 10 Helsinginkatu: Chapter 32
by Thanos Kalamidas
2009-06-05 09:14:57
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32. Memories with an ex wife

Is Juha at home? Is he alright? I thought this was the best way to make it look like I was ignoring her bruised eye. “No, he had to go!” How is his book going? Has he started working on the final phase? “He has problems with his ex-wife; she’s crazy I’m telling you!” She was ready to start crying, “She’s totally crazy, she’s asking him to go back home but you have no idea what sort of woman she is!” I decided not to say anything!


“She’s from the countryside, you have no idea how hard the women are from the countryside, she’s from somewhere east, you know the Russian side and she thinks that she owns him!” Now she was really in tears, “He wants to see his kids and she never lets him and now she moved back to her place, a very small place and she never lets him see them!” Yes I know what small places mean in Finland. I always found it difficult comparing my country with Finland. Finland is six times the size of my country and has the population of the capital. A post office, a bank, a pub and a grill kiosk constitutes a town in Finland and when they talk about a small place usually they mean a place that has all the above and lacks the bank. I’m not sure if it gets smaller and is still called a town.

“She’s torturing his soul!” she said and her eyes were wide open it was like she could see it. “And the only thing he wants is to write his book!” I wanted to say something here but I decided to keep quiet, “What’s wrong with that? Why can’t she leave him alone?” Have you met her, Leena? “Of course not, I told you she moved somewhere east, that’s why he had to go! If he wants to see his kids he has to go over there and that means that I can see him only for a few days!” Leena was sobbing now, “I hate her!” she said loud and I kept quiet. “He likes you, you know!” I have to admit that improved my spirits!!! If Juha likes me what more do I want from life! “He thinks that you have a contact, that’s how he called it!” Yes the first contact I just didn’t know who was the alien!

It took another half-an-hour and a couple of more cups of coffee for Leena to feel better and decide to go home and somehow get ready for work. I had a hundred scenarios in my mind none of them good for Juha and I started wondering how his ex looks like! I have experience of exes and I know how bitchy they can get. When I was in college I did the mistake a lot of us have done to fall for a girl desperately and believe that the only way to be together was to commit our selves for eternity. Of course the eternity lasted very little and the bitter feelings for ever. And after the divorce she had bitter and bitchy in an extreme way I have to admit confirmed that I will never understand women. A few years after our divorce she got married again but she always kept in contact with me and she had this strange attitude of checking on me, checking on my girlfriends and always trying to get involved in my life.

When she found out that she was pregnant for the first time she called me first on her way out of the doctor and she actually said that she prefers to share the happy news with me instead of the wanker who calls himself her husband! Once she called a girlfriend of mine to check on her and warn her that if she will not be nice with me she would be in serious trouble. The amazing thing was that every time we met after the divorce we manage to end the briefest encounter into a huge argument calling each other names. The more amazing thing was that while married we never, absolutely never, had an argument. I think the worst argument we ever had had to do with the English education system and why I thought the German is better; you see she was English and teacher.

But as I said before, after the divorce she became a real bitch and this has nothing to do with checking my girlfriends only, after the divorce I went home for the last time to pick some of clothes and I found them packed in black plastic rubbish bags. I was somehow happy that in the end we could have a nice separation and probably remain friends, after all we had spent our youth or at least our first adult years together, so I picked the bags and I returned to my place to find out that all my clothes had been cut into small pieces! I’m not joking and the only thing that made me feel better was the thought of how many hours she had spent doing all this work, probably it was the first time in her life she actually had to work hard for something!

There are just too many stories about my ex-wife and I think I could spent hours saying all these stories, you see time always heals the bitter parts and what remains is the funny side of all these, perhaps a lot of self sarcasm as well. Thinking about it I think it all had to do with how young we were, we somehow grew up together and in the end we found out that we weren’t made it for each other but the same time we had commit our selves into a marriage life. And the divorce had been a very difficult project that had lasted for years; you see apart from all the other problems we had to have the Archbishop of Canterbury to sign the damn divorce! Long story I will explain another time!

All characters and events depicted are fictional, and any resemblance to persons living, dead, or fictional or situations past, present, or fictional is purely and completely coincidental. 


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