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The Skies are Alive with Flyin' Drone-Critters ! The Skies are Alive with Flyin' Drone-Critters !
by Leah Sellers
2012-02-27 07:39:09
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Pa Mockingbird and Cousin Jeb flew into the Family Nest in a flurry of feathers and air.
 
“Whew !  Did you see that, Ma ?”  Pa Mockingbird asked with alarm.
 
“See what, Pa ?”  Ma Mockingbird asked casually.

 
“That Hummingbird buzzin’ and zippin’ through our Territorial Airspace 90 miles to nothing,’” Pa complained.
 
“Pa, that’s not a hummingbird.  It’s a mechanical contraption the Humans call a Drone,”  Ma Mockingbird explained.
 
“A Drone ?  Why, Ma, you know as well as I do that Drones are lazy male bees, that hang out in the Hive with the Queen Bee, while all the other Worker Bees do all the actual work.  That Critter was flyin’ way too fast to be a Drone,”  Pa Mockingbird argued.
 
“You got that right, Cuz,” interjected Cousin Jeb Mockingbird.
 
“No, Jeb, he does not.  I’m telling’ both of you, that I have heard the Humans talkin’ about these Drone machines disturbin’ Everybody’s Territorial Air Space.  The American Human Bein’s just passed somethin’ called a bi-partisan Bill in their Congress approvin’ the makin’ and flyin’ of around 30,000 of these Drone-Critters all over the United States, and elsewhere by 2020.  In fact, the Drone-Critters come in all shapes and sizes, and do all kinds of terribly invasive and destructive things.  They take pictures without anyone‘s prior knowledge or consent.  Or they shoot bullets, spray out bio-toxins or even drop bombs,” Ma Mockingbird added.
 
Eli Mockingbird began to jump around the Nest excitedly, “Oh, Ma, can I go out with Pa and Cousin Jeb to git a gander of the flyin’ Drone Critters  ?  Please, oh please, oh please, can I go, Ma ?”
 
“Certainly not, young Fledgling.  You’re goin’ to help your Mama out with the rest of this mornin’s chores.  Speakin’ of chores, have you boys scrounged up anything for breakfast yet,”  Ma Mockingbird asked poignantly.
 
“No, Ma, I’m afraid that Cousin Jeb and I got too caught up followin’ that flyin’ Drone-Critter around,” confessed Pa Mockingbird.
 
“Why in tarnation would the Humans want their Right to Privacy taken away from them by those Drone-Critters and their Leaders, Ma ?  Why would any livin’ creature want that ?  Who in the world would want to Create  flyin’ machines that would spy all day and night on Humans or kill ‘em ?  It makes no sense,” Pa Mockingbird puzzled.
 
“I’m with you, Pa,”  Ma Mockingbird agreed.  “It makes no common sense at all.  But the Human Leaders are sayin’ that the flyin’ Drone-Critters are for Safety.  They say that the Drones will help find missin’ persons or criminals; or maybe even stop some criminals from criminalizin’ all together by catchin’ them in the act, and stoppin’ the crime from takin’ place at all.”
 
“The Humans are willin’ to give up their privacy out of Fear that somethin’ bad might happen ?  Life is filled with unexpected things happenin’.  We can’t control everything in life.  It’s impossible, and definitely not worth givin’ up your privacy and liberties for,” Pa ruminated.
 
“Hurrumph,” Jeb grumbled loudly, “ I’d like to know who’s gittin’ full pockets from this deal ?  Whoever’s makin’ and marketin’ these pesky Drone-Critters is makin’ a pretty penny, I’ll grant you that.”
 
“You mark my words.  Some Human politician, banker or corporation big wig is makin’ a lot of money off of these flyin’ tse-tse flies and condor bombers.”
 
“Spyin’, shootin’, sprayin’ poisons, bullets and bombs.  What craziness !  Human Bein’s are the most destructive and zany creatures on this planet,” Cousin Jeb announced incredulously.
 
“I’ll have to agree with you, Cousin Jeb,”  Ma Mockingbird chimed in.  “It’s pure insanity.  But not all of Human Bein’s Ideas are cock-a-mamey.  The Swiss Human Bein’s have created a flyin’ machine that can go into Outer Space to collect all of the Human Bein’s space garbage.  It’s supposed to be launched some time soon to pick up all of their space junk, and get it safely out of Outer Space before the Earth’s gravity grabs hold of it and drags it out of the sky to land in someone’s backyard or Family Nest.”
 
Pa Mockingbird ruffled his feathers, “As though we don’t have enough to worry about in the sky watchin’ out for those pesky red-tailed hawks that keep dive bombin’ us, and tryin’ to make a meal out of us, every chance they git.  Now, we gotta worry about all of these gol’durned flyin’ machines the Human Bein’s keep congestin’ and pollutin’ the skies with.”
 
“Although, I must say that I don’t mind the Human’s mechanical contraptions bein’ Space Janitors, so much as I do mind Eye-Spy machines zippin’ around in my business - my Nest - my Right to a Private Life, all of the time.”
 
“ If you ask me,” interjected Cousin Jeb, “I’d say that the Human Bein’s invented those Drone Critters for Flock Control.  Whoever’s runnin’ those machines is tryin’ to control Human Behaviors, just like that All Knowin’, All Seein’ Myopic Cyclops Eye that you warned us about awhile back, Ma.  These Drone-Critters are nothing‘ more than flyin‘ Tattle-Tells, Fear Inducin’ Flock Control Prods, and Maraudin’ Murder Machines.”
 
Eli Mockingbird got excited again, “You mean that there are Flyin’ Eyeballs buzzin’ around out there, too, Cousin Jeb ?”
 
“Might as well be, Eli.  It’s getting’ so’s a Bird’s Life is not his own anymore.  Much less a Human Bein’s,”  Cousin Jeb answered.
 
“Eli, did you just poop in our Nest, young Fledgling ?” Ma asked exasperatedly.
 
Eli, ducked his head in shame, “Yes, Ma.  I’m sorry.”
 
“You Bird-Brain !” Pa Mockingbird said angrily.
 
“Now, calm down, Pa.  Eli’s no Bird-Brain.  Fact of the matter is that he’s a Brainy-Bird.  I accept your apology, Fledgling.  Now you go get the Super Dooper Pooper Scooper your Pa put together last week and get that mess cleaned up,”  Ma Mockingbird ordered.
 
“Yes, Ma.  I did not mean to break one of your strictest Rules.  That no self-respectin’ Mockingbird ever poops in their own Nest,” Eli responded.
 
“Ha !  Which is more than we can say about the Human Bein’s !” Pa Mockingbird chortled.
 
Buzzzzzzz !  Zipppppp !
 
Simultaneously, the Mockingbirds quickly dodged the flying Drone-Critter as it buzzed and zipped right over their heads and proceeded to disappear into the deep, and thickly forested woods surrounding the Mockingbird‘s Family Nest.
 
“What in tarnation !” yelped Pa Mockingbird.  “I have had enough of that infernal mechanical contraption intrudin’ on my liberties and freedoms !”
 
“Come on , boys !  It’s time to go Drone-Critter huntin’ ! Pa Mockingbird ordered.
 
“Eli, you go grab the Super Dooper Pooper Scooper and load it up full !  Jeb, you and I will load up our beaks with this here chewin’ tobacco.”  Pa Mockingbird passed a large lump of chaw to Cousin Jeb.
 
“We’re gonna swoop a little Poop and spit a little tobacky at that privacy stealin’ Drone-Critter, boys !  Come on, time’s a wastin’ !  We‘re gonna give that flyin‘ contraption a little dose of it‘s own bitter medicine !”
 
“Pa, you boys be careful !”  Ma Mockingbird shouted after them worriedly.
 
“Don’t worry, Ma.  We’ll be back before you know it !”  Pa Mockingbird bravely called back.
 
In the distance, Ma Mockingbird could hear Cousin Jeb singing, “Eye Spy You - You Spy Me.  Welcome to the Eye-Spy Societies World-To-Be !”


   
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