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Tara Tara
by Abigail George
2010-05-21 07:27:31
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Since you ask, most days I cannot remember.
Why can’t I remember most days?
My name is English, the town that I’ve lived in
For all of my childhood and my date of birth, that I know.
Trivia, current affairs, vacant rooms, wards are rendered obsolete
Wherein we are all governed like some drowning thing by fate
But you wouldn’t believe me if I told you.

Not even if I say, "My life so far has been surreal."
I am shut in, shut out, like the sound of silence calling
At the end of visiting day it is almost as if to say
When the melody dies, as if to say, you loved me
Because you told me so, the eyes never lie.

Through the eye of the needle I am almost invisible
My heart is on the mend, pumped up, pumping for joy
Internal becomes external – a white landscape
Of Nothingness, vapour like fog, crushing, numbing, still
External becomes internal – red, fuchsia, gold, burnt sienna, golden glow

Flashes of brilliance, of growth quickened, vanity, progress and my
Natural vision restored, granted, desensitised, and sedated
When we are demotivated, unable to define or to remain
Unmarked by what lies at the bottom of our "aloneness",
Our "alien nation" - moulded between shadow and shape on a canvas
The stunning light that always seems to surround me,
Transform me, transfix me, bedazzle me

For now, I have simply declared myself a voyager, a passenger
Hoping all is not lost in the enemy that is time.


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