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Up for the Cup! Up for the Cup!
by Clint Wayne
2007-04-05 09:53:21
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Hey lads, do you remember back to those heady teenage years following an enjoyable night out with your girlfriend? Instead of driving her directly home you managed to persuade her to agree to stop off at your favourite little romantic spot.

As consenting adults you would both slip into the back seat of your ‘love wagon’ and as the mandatory kissing and cuddling commenced becoming more passionate, you got the delectable feeling that she’s really is in the mood tonight.

With that next long lingering kiss you casually, but expertly - after all those years of training - slip your hand gently under her blouse and roaming up her tingling spine you reach your sought after location of ‘the strap’.

The moment had arrived to show off to your partner your expertise and coolness in carrying out the majestic manoeuvre of the one-handed unhooking of the double clasp, but no ……. No you’ve blown it, no matter what you do to that tiny little hook and clasp it is not for moving. You may as well be threading a needle with a pair of gloves on. The dreaded fumble has ruined the moment and left you with nothing but ridicule.

Well lads, according to Vogue magazine, this week marks the 100th anniversary of the brassiere.

From the demise of the corset to the ‘Playtex’ cross your heart living bra, from the ‘Sheepdog Bra’ that rounds them up and points them in the right direction to the 1970s over-the-shoulder-boulder-holder and finally the ultra-modern ‘Wonderbra’, which promises cleavage to die for, the bra has gone from strength to strength. Lead me on Satan!

Traditionally it is viewed as symbolic of a young girl's coming of age, one of the tokens that indicate that she has matured into a young woman. The modern bra is far more decorative to its predecessors, which were then ‘built for purpose’ and have therefore become a fashion statement, an adornment and show of a woman’s sensuality.

The comfort and function of any given bra is highly dependent on the correct size and fit. To explain the sizing of a woman’s bra is like teaching nuclear physics to a buffoon and every woman has my utmost respect in the calculation of their bra size taking into account the measurement of ribcage and overbust to achieve the cup size…… And to think that my Grandad, when I was a boy, once told me that the lady sitting opposite us on the bus had a bra size 8 because he could get his cap over it!

Did you know that a pair of ‘D Cup’ breasts could weigh between 7 and 10kg? The function of lifting and supporting them from their normal position laying against the chest wall to their elevated position with the straps and bearing very little weight is, for me, an engineering miracle.

Designers have now provided our girls with numerous choices from the strapless, the front loader, the push-up and plunge to the maternity bra with opening trap door for baby convenience and the modern sports bra whose sole objective is provide no movement at all thus denying us lecherous onlookers no enjoyment whatsoever as they carry out their fitness regime.

The modern ‘matching set’ of bra and knickers are now displayed in ladies fashion shops up and down our High Streets and, last Christmas, Marks and Spencer’s even employed specially trained shop assistants to aid embarrassed male shoppers buying gifts for their wives and girlfriends. Lingerie is certainly now a booming business and never likely to go bust!

  
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Eva2007-04-05 12:27:03
Well you've obviously done your research... ;)


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