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Shadow Shadow
by Gordana Mudri
2016-03-07 09:39:52
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Echoes of my footsteps hitting mouldy walls, arousing ghosts from the cold stones. Their screams rip my soul. Their whispers become my companions. I'm the silent shadow in the hallways out of time.

gor01_400_06I think I was born here. I don't remember other places or time, just these thick-wet walls all too high, these dark hallways all too cold and invisible ceilings never seen, up in the dark.  And the windows. Unreachable pieces of light, high above my head, like thin cuts on flesh, almost invisible. White blood streaming down the walls. Thin rays of light, deadly blades that rip my shadow.

An endless labyrinth of pain. And I'm walking, chained without chains, collecting the wounds, absorbing the screams…

My face is pale and bloodless. My eyes are dark and lifeless. My hands are cold.

My heart is glowing lump. The beat of the beast beneath the burden of being.

The heat under the ice veils… Locked, painful.

I'm walking, going nowhere. This cold tomb is waiting for my end, for the last beat of my beast; to smash my flesh on this stones and spread my ash over the holes; to soak me into this mouldy walls and turn me into the screaming ghost.

I'm the silent shadow in the hallways of my tomb.  The winds are howling through the ruins of my soul.

 **************************************************************

Sjena

Bat mojih koraka odzvanja između  vlažnih zidova. Nemir izvlači duhove  iz hladnog kamenja. Njihovi krici razdiru moju dušu. Njihovi šapati moji su suputnici. Ja sam tiha sjena u hodnicima bez vremena.

gor02_400_04Mislim da sam rođena ovdje. Ne pamtim drugo mjesto ni vrijeme, samo ove debele, vlažne zidove previše visoke, ove mračne hodnike previše hladne i visoke stropove nikad viđene, tamo gore u tami. I prozore. Nedostižne komadiće svjetla visoko iznad moje glave, kao tanke posjekotine na tijelu, gotovo nevidljive. Bijela krv teče niz zidove. Tanke trake svjetlosti, kao smrtonosne oštrice koje rasijecaju moju sjenu.

Beskonačni labirint bola. A ja hodam, okovana nevidljivim okovima, gomilam rane, upijam krikove…

Lice mi je blijedo i beskrvno. Oči su mi mračne i beživotne. Ruke su mi hladne.

Moje srce je užareni grumen. Bijes bubnjeva pod blatom beznađa.

Plamen ispod ledenih koprena…  Zaključan i bolan.

Hodam, a nigdje ne stižem. Ova hladna grobnica čeka moj kraj, čeka posljednji odjek bubnjeva da razbije moje meso o ovo  kamenje i rasprši moj pepeo u pukotine, da me upije u ove pljesnive zidove i pretvori me u krik duhova.

Ja sam tiha sjena u hodnicima moje grobnice. Vjetrovi zavijaju ruševinama moje duše.


   
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