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A Man of the Past, Present and Future, Am I A Man of the Past, Present and Future, Am I
by Leah Sellers
2014-06-27 11:37:55
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“Fester, why are you and Chester not speakin’ to one another right now ?  I tried to get up a friendly Game of Poker with him and the Gang, and he said, ‘fine, as long as Fester’s not invited.’”  What’s happened between you two ?

You fella’s have been best friends since elementary school ?”
 
“Chester, lives in the Past.  I’m all about the Present and the Future, Lester.  That’s all there is to it,”  Fester replied cooly.
 
“How does Chester live in the Past, Fester ?”
 
“He dwells on the Past, Lester.  He locks onto a negative idea and won’t let go of it.  He lets it hold him up, and hold him down in the Past.  I’m all about takin’ me and my Friendships on down the road of the Present and the Future.  And not gettin’ bogged down in any of Chester’s Pasts hog swallop.”
 
“And what hog swallop are you referrin’ to, Fester ?  What happened ?”
 
“What happened ?  Well, I’ll tell you what happened, Lester.  And my Explainin’ will explain everything about this Past matter in between me and Chester, Lester.”
 
“Good enough.  I’m Listenin’,” Lester acknowledged.
 
“Well, I asked Chester if I could borrow his old Ford pick-up.  Mine was in the shop, and Mary Lou wanted to go to the Music Jamboree bein’ held out at the American Legion Hall a little over a week ago.”
 
“Did Chester refuse you his truck ?”  Lester asked.
 
“No, that’s not Chester’s way.  He loaned me the truck and Mary Lou and I went and had ourselves a whoppin’ good time at the Jamboree.  We danced all night, ate our fill of dee-licious barbeque, and drank our fill of Candy’s iced Sun Tea.”
 
“Sounds like a good time had by all,”  Lester interjected.
 
“It was.  It was,”  Fester agreed.
“So, does this Tale of yours have a point to it ?  “Cause I still don’t hear what it is that’s ailin’ you and Chester’s Frienship.”
 
“Well then, I’ll get straight to the point for ya’, Lester.  Chester’s truck got wrecked by some Drunk Fool on the road home.  The Drunken Fool side-swiped Mary Lou and I.  Almost ran us right off into a deep ditch, and into a barbed wire fence.”  Fester blurted out defensively.
 
“The gol durned Drunken Fool got my dander up somethin’ fierce.  I tried to chase him down to give him a piece of my mind and get his insurance.  But Mary Lou kept screamin’ at me to slow down before we wound up in another wreck, and dead on the side of the road.  And Chester’s truck engine smoked up and sorta’ gave out on us.  So, I had to pull over, and listen to Mary Lou scream at me some more.”
 
“You mean the guy that wrecked Chester’s truck got away Scott-free ?”  Lester asked incredulously.
 
“That’s exactly what I mean.  I couldn’t do anything about it, but watch that yella’-bellied Snake’s red tail lights disappear down the county road.  Poof !  He was gone into the blackness of the night, and I was left with Chester‘s broke down truck and Mary Lou screamin‘ at me.  It was enough to churn and curdle all of the barbeque and Candy‘s Sun Tea in me.  I let it all up right there on the side of the road, behind Chester‘s old Ford.”
 
“Yep, after I reluctantly emptied my achin’ belly, I borrowed Mary Lou’s cell phone and dialed up Triple AAA to come and pick me and Mary Lou up, and haul Chester’s truck on down to Hank’s Garage.”
 
“Sorry, about you and Mary Lou’s ruined evening, but Hank’s a good mechanic.  Chester’s truck is in Good Hands,” Lester offered.
 
“Yep.  Hank’s the best around these parts.”  Fester answered.
 
“So, why are you and Chester not talkin’ to one another ?”  Lester persisted.
 
“Chester’s Ford pick-up is still sittin’ in Hank’s Garage untouched,”  Lester sighed loudly.  “Chester wants me to pay to get it fixed.  I don’t want my already too high monthly insurance rates to skyrocket even higher.”
 
“What ?!”  Lester stared disbelievingly at Fester.
 
“The wreck was not my fault.  I don’t think that I should have to pay for somethin’ that I didn’t do.  It was not my fault.  It was that disappearin’ Drunken Fool’s fault.  Why should I have to pay for someone else’s
mis-take ?  The truck belongs to Chester.  If Chester had been drivin’ it instead of me at that time, the outcome would have been the same.  Chester needs to pay for havin’ his own truck fixed.  Not me.  It was not my fault.”
 
“I kept tellin’ Chester that he needed to put all of this mess into the Past, and Forgive me for borrowin’ his ole truck in the first place.  That he needed to let go of his selfish grudge and move on forward into a more agreeable Present and Future Stae of Mind.  But he’s havin’ none of it, and none of me instead.
So Be It.”
 
Lester stood flabbergasted.  Finally he cleared his throat and said, “Fester, we’ve been Friends a long time, but you are dead wrong about this.  You need to call Hank up, pull out your insurance card, and take care of this.  You need to do the right thing for a Friend who did the right thing for you.”
 
“But it was not my fault !  Why should I have to be punished for somethin’ I was not responsible for ?”
 
“I can appreciate your point-of-view Fester,  but Chester was good enough to loan you his truck so that you could show Mary Lou a good time.  He knows what that woman means to you.  You were drivin’ that truck when it got hit, not Chester.  You’re not at fault, that gol durned Drunken Fool is, but you are Responsible.”
 
“I’ve been savin’ my money to ask Mary Lou to marry me, Lester.  Why can’t Chester just put this behind him ?  Put it in the Past, where it belongs, and pick up our Friendship the way it was before that gol danged Drunken Fool ran into all of us ?”  Fester said exasperatedly.
 
“Because Presently, Chester’s truck is still sittin’ in Harvey’s Garage damaged and non-functioning.  A constant reminder of a very unpleasant Past Event that I’m pretty certain he’d like to put behind him and into the Past in order to move forward into somethin’ better in the Present and Future like you keep yappin’ on and on about.”  Lester took a deep breath and said more calmly,  “Chester depends on that old truck for all the ranch’s rough duties and jobs, Fester.”
 
“He didn’t give me his new truck to pick Mary Lou up in.  Oh no, instead he gave me that old beat up field truck,”  Fester grumbled.
 
“You are still missin’ the point, Fester,”  Lester growled lowly.
 
“If you want a Future Friendship with Chester, you need to pay up and get it fixed right now in this very Present Moment.  So, that you and Chester really can get Past this and get all of this behind you Properly, Rightly and Cleanly.”
 
“Fester, Friendships are all about the Past, Present and Future.  They’re never just one or the other unless we Choose to Use or Abuse or Abandon them into the Past.  Do that, and a Friendship has no Present or Future.  You are at a very crucial Crossroads Choice here, Fester.”
 
“Gol durn it !  Alright !  I get it !  I don’t like it !  I don’t deserve to pay for somethin’ that some other Fool’s caused to happen, but I do value Chester’s Friendship !”  Fester huffed loudly.
 
“You won’t regret makin’ this Choice for your Present or your Future, Fester.”
 
“You’re a Good Friend, Lester.  Thank you,”  Fester said shyly, as he reached out to shake his Friend’s hand.
 
Enthusiastically accepting his Friend’s handshake, Lester added, ”Think nothing’ of it, Lester.  My Mama once told me that the Deeds and Songs of the Past forever Vibrate and Resonate themselves right into the Energies of the Present and the Future.”
 
“Your Mama was one Smart Lady, Lester,”  Fester smiled at his Friend.  Well, I’m gonna’ go give Mary Lou a call.  She hasn’t been speakin’ to me either ever since the wreck, and my refusin‘ to pay for it.  Somethin’ tells me that when she hears what I’ve got to say that her behavior will also become a part of the Past.  So, that Mary Lou and I can move into a happier Present and Future State of Being,”  Fester guffawed.  “Did that sound high and mighty enough for ya’, Lester ?  See, you’re not the only one who can carry on that way.”
 
“Oh git on outa’ here you scoundrel, before I forget my manners and put our Friendship to the test by lightin’ into you hard and heavy,”  Lester laughed.
 
“You can try, Amigo.  You can try.  Adios, Amigo.  I’m gonna’ go hasta my la vista,”  Fester said as he turned to go singing his best Tin Ear version of “Here we go Loopty-Loo.  Here I come Mary Lou.  Here we Loopty-Li.  A Man of Past, Present and Future, Am I.”


       
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